Frustration

I am drowning in self-pity today. Life is always a series of ups and downs, but when that pattern repeats itself multiple times an a very short span, it not only looks a little bumpy if drawn out, but it feels bumpy. How can I go from laugh to near tears to prayerful desperation to supermom all in about two minutes, and not feel like someone is deliberately rocking the boat. I am learning quickly that the need for foster parents is great, and the respect of my peers is mostly positive, but the support we get from those who are supposed to be helping the children is less than stellar. For example: a caseworker 'yanks' the kids, and contacts foster care. Foster care then secures a home for the kids. The foster parents get the call, and in our case have a very brief (because they give you about 5 minutes to decide the future of your family without any history of these kids other than their sex and approximate age) conversation, a quick prayer, a mental count of how many empty seats we have left in the truck, and then we accept. The kids are then brought to us with usually nothing or very close to it. The bottle in their mouth, and maybe a coat. The caseworkers stay about 5 minutes and we don't hear from them again for a few days. Now, after repeated phone calls, telling the same story to countless 'professionals,' my desperate plea for assistance with J's unbearable screeching when she doesn't have her way has been answered. Sort of. The (new) caseworker and her supervisor, who have been on the case for a whopping 6 days are coming tomorrow to 'observe and discuss' what we can do. Yep, they will have even less information on the situation than I do-even when most of the information I have is a copy of the court documents, not from anything the caseworkers have shared as pertinent information. I'm sure J will be a perfect angel while they are here, and once again these women will react like everyone else: give me a pat on the back and telling me it will take time.